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            Showing posts with label Bloggy Style.
            Showing posts with label Bloggy Style.

            Friday, July 3, 2015

            Happy 4th Of July!!!

            Don't down too many burgers today. Be easy. The blog will be back to normal soon!

            Monday, September 22, 2014

            What Sort Of Self-Respecting Black Man Wears Rundown Sneakers?

            [Editor's Note: File this one under "Random Thoughts I Have While Waiting On My K-Cup To Finish Brewing"... or something like that.]

            I am a 41 year old black man. I do not care about sneakers. I never have. Clearly, something must be wrong with me.

            I make good money, much of which goes to my wife's internet shopping hobby feed, clothe, and educate my 3 children. Beyond that, I certainly love the occasional slurge, but I'm what most people with label as "miserly". Note, this isn't the same thing as "cheap", although sometimes my wife would beg to differ. It simply means I prefer to save and invest, as opposed to blowin' money fast.

            I waste money on lots (and I do mean lots) on frivolous sh*t, but one exception is footwear. Yes, I have some very nice dress shoes. But when it comes to sneakers, I just don't care. I get a few new pair a year. They usually begin as running shoes, and then at some point reach retirement and become everyday shoes. When they're totally done, I put them out to pasture and use them when I do yardwork. Most of them are New Balance. I wash and care for these shoes, so they don't look totally rundown, but they aren't by any stretch of the imagination "new".

            Everytime I'm out, I'll inevitably pass brothers on the street, some my age, some younger, and most of them are wearing absolutely spotless, brand new shoes. The shoes will often match whatever outfit the dude's wearing, and yeah, the overall effect will usually look pretty fresh. Then I'll look down at my feet and see a pair of 993s with lots of mileage on them. For a moment, I'll feel like I'm missing out on something.

            And then I'll realize, that try and I might, I simply cannot scrounge up two f*cks about shoes, and I'll just keep it pushin'.

            I don't begrudge these brothers their right to wear brand new $150 kicks. It's just not for me. And I wonder what, if anything, that means. Ya'll tell me.

            Question: Am I the only black man that doesn't wear brand new sneakers everyday? Does this make me a weirdo?

            Monday, August 11, 2014

            One Of My Nephews Was Murdered. The Other Is Heading To College.

            [Editor's Note: I intended to write this about a year ago when the original incident happened. I couldn't then, today I am. If you need some insight into why I wrote what I did about the Mike Brown murder, I'd suggest you digest this.]

            I had an 18 year old nephew.

            Last summer, that 18 year old nephew (technically my second cousin) was gunned down while sitting on the back of a car in Ft. Myers, Florida. The assailant, who snuck up from behind the house and fired shots at the car, intended to shoot my nephew's friend. He accidentally squeezed the trigger at the wrong person, presumably because they both had the same hairstyle. I will not pretend that my nephew was a saint. He was not. He made some poor choices in life and hung with the wrong crowd. But he was attempting to turn his life around, get a job, and complete his GED when this happened.

            As I flew to Florida for the funeral, I had to confront a lot of previously unprocessed feelings. I had last spoken with my nephew a few weeks earlier, not long after he'd finished a 6 month stint in the county jail for a crime he actually didn't commit (he was released and his record was expunged after the alleged victim changed his story). He seemed genuine in his goal to move forward, even as the bitterness of a lost half year of his life lingered. He asked me for money to get a driver's license. I said I would, then I got busy with my life and I never got back to him. I felt guilty about this. I felt guilty about a lot of things, actually.

            My nephew was my spitting image as a child. He was smart, witty, funny, maybe a little too mischievous, but still, he was my buddy. When I'd take him out with me, people always assumed he was my kid, even though he was my cousin's, by a man I'd only met a couple of times and who bore no resemblance to me. As the years passed, I moved away from NC and saw him less often. His mom moved him to Florida, and I saw him even less. Between the time he was in my wedding as ring bearer (around 5-6 years of age) and the time I last saw him alive (he was maybe a preteen at this point) there wasn't much contact. The occasional phone call (usually for "I got a good report card!" money, which I gave when I could) was about it, until I found out he was in jail. From there, we reconnected, sending smail mail letters back and forth. I tried to encourage him, convince him to change his lifestyle. He gave me a the typical "I got this" brushoff that 17 years olds are apt to give, but some of it sunk in, I'm sure. Or at least I hoped it did.

            Reality is, I couldn't do much for him. Physical distance aside, there were other rifts that were too large to bridge. He briefly lived by my brother and his family in Boston, but became such a disruption to the household that they sent him back. In Florida, he had chosen friends unwisely, made typical teenage decisions. The juvie stint wasn't warranted, but he'd done plenty else already to make himself familiar to those in local law enforcement. I would have loved to help my nephew. To get him out of Central Florida and move him to DC. To get him in better schools, with better support, and help him achieve a better outcome. But I have a life of my own, with demands of my own, a family of my own, problems of my own. I could have found time to get him the money for the driver's license. Maybe it would have helped him find a better job, an education, a way out. That, of course, never happened.

            When I saw my nephew, in a casket, I barely recognized him. The bright, cheeky kid I'd last seen as a tween was gone. In his place, was someone I didn't recognize. At all. Survivor's remorse enveloped me like a wool blanket. Reality is, I didn't do more to help him. I'm not sure anything I could have done would have helped. But I didn't do enough.

            Neither did the local cops, who in an ironic twist of fate, helped the person whom the bullets were intended for flee town for safety, then escorted him back into town for the funeral. And before you ask, yes, the guy whom the bullets were intended for knew who the shooter was. And no, he wasn't talking. And the cops also knew, but because the intended victim (and the others present when this happened) wasn't talking, they couldn't bring in the guy who did it. So I watched, in suspended disbelief, as the nigga who should have been in the casket, got police protection to come to my nephew's funeral. From a logical standpoint, this made sense. If the shooter came back to their original target, you'd want cops there. From any other standpoint, this was fucking insane.

            And I couldn't take it. I left the burial, skipped the repast, and went back to my hotel. I couldn't bear the thought that the man who should have been dead (and who could help get the shooter locked up) was going to live, while my nephew's casket was being covered with dirt. Something about that reality was perverse. Disgusting. It made me feel both vengeful and depressed at the same time. It made me hate myself for not trying to do more to help my nephew, even while acknowledging that he was so deep in the lifestyle, so far gone, that nothing I did would I likely spared him the fate he met. Delayed, maybe. Prevent? unlikely.

            I have an 18 year old nephew.

            He is smart, witty, funny. On rare occasions when he was younger and my wife and I had him out in public, people would often mistake him for my child, which is kinda silly because we are related by marriage. He was also a ring bearer in my wedding, along with the aforementioned nephew.

            Some days, when I sit alone with my thoughts, I am absolutely dumbfounded by how much their lives diverged since the only time the two of them met, some 13 years ago. While one nephew is in a grave, the other leaves for college, at my alma mater, to pursue the same degree as his uncle later this week. And I couldn't be prouder of him.

            This nephew had advantages my other didn't. A two parent household. A safe neighborhood. Good schools. Constant reinforcement from those around him. I cannot pretend that I had any bearing in how he turned out. I was just his uncle, a guy helped a little at the end, with college applications and visits. That was about it. But in many ways, I feel like it's my son headed to AggieLand this weekend.

            I just wish there were two of them.

            Wednesday, August 6, 2014

            America's Coolest City Is.... Washington, DC?!?

            Coming out of college, I had multiple job offers to mull over, and literally sat down one night to do a "pros/cons" list to sort it all out. I didn't have a Lebron James-style "Decision" in the end, but I eventually settled on Washington, DC for a multitude of reasons. It was close to my native NC. The weather was good. It was a major city, but not a huge city. The money was good. And oh yeah, it was "cool", by whatever subjective measure one determines coolness. For me, the "coolness" had to do with it being the "Chocolate City", one that was majority black, with great nightlife options, a reputation for beautiful, upwardly mobile sistas, and a place where I could see myself succeeding career-wise. So yeah, DC was "cool".

            I could have gone a number of other arguably "cooler" places, like Los Angeles or Atlanta, but this was the best choice, and I'm still here 2 decades (damn I'm old!) later. I love it here, and I'll prolly never leave. That said, as much as I love DC, I don't think anyone would consider it the "Coolest" city in America. .
            Flooded with politicos and political junkies, Washington, D.C., often comes off as a city steeped in raw ambition. But the nation’s capital deserves to be known for something else: coolness.

            While “cool” might not be the first word that comes to mind when contemplating the latest standoff in Congress, D.C. nonetheless has a lot to offer those who call it 北京体彩网官方网站. Among its best features: abundant entertainment and recreational options, an ethnically and culturally diverse population, and a big chunk of people age 20 to 34–nearly 30% of the metro area’s population. There’s certainly plenty to do, from visiting the many museums along the National Mall to taking in a Washington Nationals game to simply enjoying the cherry blossoms in springtime.

            “D.C. is a high-amenity city. It has its share of cultural arts. It has its share of natural beauty,” says Stuart Gabriel, Director of the Ziman Center for Real Estate at the UCLA Anderson School of Management.

            Add the city’s constantly refreshing population–the metro area has grown by 4.9% since 2010 thanks to net migration alone–and Washington, D.C., holds the perfect formula to land the No. 1 spot on Forbes’ list of America’s Coolest Cities. And by “cool,” we mean cool to live in.
            Anytime someone begins describing DC as a city full of "politicos", they immediately lose any credibility with me. I mean, come on, there might be a few thousand people combined working on the Hill and in the media here tops. The city is 650,000 strong. Add in the rest of the DMV and this is a region of around 5 million people. It's a huge area, full of very diverse people. An overwhelming majority of them don't work for the government, and only a miniscule amount are involved in politics. Simply put, there's a lot more to DC than Obama. I get how an outsider would assume that, but come on, that's just lazy. It would be like assuming everyone in LA is a struggling actor, or that everyone from the South Side of Chicago is a Vicelord. Actually, that 2nd one might be accurate.

            Anyways, as I guy who lives here, no, DC is emphatically not the coolest place in America. In no specific order, New York City, New Orleans, Miami, Las Vegas, San Diego, and Seattle are a handful of places off the top of my head that are "cooler". No, it's not Milwaukee or Cincinnati, but DC isn't the coolest place in America. Come on, sonn.

            The list also had Houston as #4, which should tell you all you need to know.

            Anyways, pointless question time...

            Question: What's America's coolest city? What's the "least cool/most lame" place you've been?

            Thursday, July 10, 2014

            A Word From The Management Of AB.com (...And Today's Open Mic!)

            No, this blog hasn't (totally) gone black. Folks, ya'll know the drill. I have a Day Job. I have a wife. I have #3Kidz. I don't have free time. Something has to give, and lately... okay, for the past year, this blog has been that something.

            I'm not closing shop. Not even remotely. But sporadic posting is gonna be a way of life here until one of the aforementioned obstacles changes. I don't see that happening anytime soon, because I love my wife and #3Kidz, and I have bills. Pepco and Montessori schooling don't pay for themselves.

            I hope you'll all stick with me nonetheless. You can always follow me on Twitter, which I mysteriously find a lot more convenient a place to talk. You know, 140 characters and whatnot. ! What are you waiting for.

            Anyways, drop your links and whatever else below and keep the convo moving. I'll be back soon. Or not. Or soon.

            Question: What's on your mind today? Drop some links, start a convo.

            Tuesday, February 11, 2014

            Bro, What Happened To My (Favorite) Blog?!?

            So yeah, you're probably wondering what exactly happened to this blog, and maybe (ok, prolly not) wondering what happened to me. Well, it's pretty simple: I've been dealing with two things that have been monopolizing my time of late. One rhymes with Jay Dob, and the other rhymes with Khree Tids. Or something like like. Whatever, whatever.

            So basically, I've been busy. Simple as that. I have a treat for you today though, since I've got a fleeting spare minute. I'd usually do a NewsBriefs post to catchup on all the old stuff I've been missing, but I'm just gonna keep it funky and give you a bunch of new postage. Go get that.

            - AB

            Friday, December 20, 2013

            The AB.com Christmas Open Mic.

            I'm officially outta here for a minute. Here's the open mic. Ya'll have a great holiday.

            Thursday, December 19, 2013

            What I Learned Over A Month (Or So) As A Non-Black Anoymous Internet Commenter.

            A month (or so) ago, I changed my ubiquitous avatar from a cartoonish approximation of my handsome real life visage, to a race neutral cartoonish approximation of a guy holding an American Flag. I also ditched my screen name, making it something fairly generic ("A/B") as well.

            [Editor's Note: This piece likely has a million and one grammatic and spelling errors. I'm not proofreading it, nor fixing them. Mostly because I'm lazy. And also, because #science. Don't let that deter you.]

            The point of this was to see if my opinions would be responded to more readily if people weren't initially forming their rebuttal with my race in mind. It was a social experiment of sorts, but it was also an acknowledgement that I get tired of being accused of being an unemployed welfare moocher with 6 illegitimate kids by people who don't know me when I'm merely trying to debate the finer points of the Afforable Care Act with some stranger on Mediaite.

            There's no denying that people are more apt to repond in a different manner online that when in person. And there's likewise no doubt that people are going to form opinions of you based on ther sole appearance related item (an avatar) that you typically present online. Heck, people respond based on their (perceived) level of safety.

            Tell em, Louis CK.[1]



            After doing this for a month, I changed my avatar and screen name back today. I wish I could present you guys a more scientific analysis of what I learned via this little experiement, but it's close to the holidays, and I'm lazy and whatnot, so this will have to suffice.
            People (Initially) Treated Me Much Better And Didn't Just (Initially) Outright Dismiss My Opinion - To be certain, I didn't change the nature of my typical comment on any of the sites I typically weigh in on. I don't usually identify myself as black when I comment either, unless the subject calls for that, and I never did so during this month. Not once in my generic avi experiment was I accused of being on The Welfare or getting SNAP benefits. Being a "liberal" and an ObamaBot, sure. But nothing racial. Ever. And I found fellow commenters far more likely to engage in debate, rather than just dismissing me. Hmmmmmm.

            I Never Got "Outed" - You'd think people would just click on my profile, see the link to my site, and figure out I was a black guy. Didn't happen. I'm not shocked either, because most people don't have that kinda time.

            I'm Not Surprised By Any Of This, Nor Do I Really Think It's A Problem. - There is racism in America. That's a fact, despite whatever Fox News might suggest. It just is what it is, and I don't think it's going away anytime soon. To police their comment boards, , in an attempt to limiting trolls and anonymous comments. The thought is that if people have to put their real name and face beside what they're saying they'll likely be more considerate and thus more civil.[2] As a guy who has made his name via a largely anonymous online persona, you might guess where I fall on this topic.
            All in all, this results of this experiment weren't really suprising. I long assumed people lobbed racist comments at me because I was black, and that was essentially confirmed. And I don't really know if my life's any better for wear with that bit of information.

            Question: What are your thoughts on this topic? Do you also find people online respond to you based on assumptions formed via your avatar/screen name?

            [1] Speaking of appearance-based stereotypes, I slept on this guy for the longest because I assumed I wouldn't find his style of comedy very relatable. I was completely wrong. I don't know if I agree with the "genius" label many people fling at him, but seriously, this dude is absolutely hilarious.

            [2] See the comedy clip again, just for reinforcement of this concept.

            Thursday, November 14, 2013

            What Are Your Favorite North American Cities To Visit?!?

            I travel extensively for my Day Job. I don't always enjoy this, but one perk is the ability to see a lot of places on someone else's dime. I think I've been the every "major" US city with the exception of Cincinnati and Columbus, OH. I'm not sure where I got the idea for this post, but participate anyway. No grand social experiment here, just curious about a few things:
            1) What's your favorite North American city? We're not talking international here.[1]

            2) What's the city/place you dislike visiting the most?

            3) Where's a place you'd love to go, but haven't yet?

            4) Name a city that's really, really overrated.

            5) Name a city that's kinda slept on.

            6) What's the sh*ttiest place you've visited?!?
            Mine are pretty straightforward:
            1) The Entire Bay Area - I suppose I'd pick San Francisco, simply because it's so beautiful. But Oakland, Berkeley and the rest of the East Bay are also nice. So yeah, the whole Yay Area. Runners Up: Toronto, New Orleans, Austin.

            2) Boston - I just don't like that place. The people are rude as sh*t, they cannot drive, the weather sucks, and everything's overpriced. Runners Up: Orlando, Houston, Los Angeles.

            3) Vancouver - It just seems like such a beautiful place. Combine San Francisco and Seattle. Throw in some mountains. And so many movies are filmed there. I have no idea of the culture or local vibe, but this is a place I'd probably just visit to take photos. Runners Up: Albequerque, Madison, Anywhere in Vermont.

            4) Miami - Lovely if you have money to blow. Otherwise, not so much. Okay, who am I kidding? Miami is awesome! If you're 21 and unmarried. Otherwise, what's the point? I'd take Ft. Lauderdale anyday. Runners Up: Charlotte, Austin (yes, twice!), Las Vegas.

            5) Memphis - Other than New Orleans, I don't think there's a city with as much unique local culture. This place is just lovely and laid back. Great food and live music. Nice weather and an easy to navigate downtown. Runners Up: Portland, Hartford, Minneapolis, Salt Lake City (yes, really), Harrisburg, .

            6) Camden, NJ - No disrespect to my Jersey peoples, but this sh*t was just depressing. It looks like a city where people used to live. When you cross that bridge from Philly, you better lock your doors and roll up the windows. I'm sure half of ya'll were expecting me to say Detroit. I'm not. #MercyRule Runners Up: Newark, Tallahassee, Topeka..
            Tell me yours in the comments section.

            Question: Answer any of the questions above.

            [1] You probably noticed DC was missing from this list. That's because it (and NC) is 北京体彩网官方网站.

            Wednesday, November 13, 2013

            About My New .AVI And Racist Commenters...

            While I love AB.com (duh!) and love interacting with you guys here, I spend time elsewhere on the interwebs. I love a variety of sites like Mediaite, The Atlantic, Salon, Slate, The Fox Nation, BreitBart, and The National Review, mostly because I love occasional trolling and these sites have some dimwitted people more than willing to feed me.

            That prior sentence was only partially true: sometimes I like attempting to engage people with opposing viewpoints. Not because I'm trying to impose my opinion on them, but because I genuinely want to know what makes people tick. Some websites (like this one) are pretty reasonable places for people to actually debate topics without things descending into name calling. Mostly because I don't write the sort of content that draws morons, and also because you guys are pretty darn good at self policing. Take a bow.

            Every site isn't as civil as this one, of course. Many of the sites I named above are little more than SEO 北京体彩网官方网站 troll bait disguised as intellectual discussion. And more times than not, my geniune inquiries on these sites results in someone hurling some racist, ignorant drivel at me without even paying any attention to what I actually typed.

            This drivel almost always seems to mention the words "Obama", "welfare", "liberal", "ghetto", "moocher", "plantation", "Africa", "below-average intelligence" "hood", "goverment check", and sometimes the dreaded "N-word". It's almost as if people can't deal with any substantive rebuttal of their own opinions without resorting to time tested racial slurs, overt and otherwise. And yes, I already know this is the sign of a feeble minded person who doesn't deserve a reply. No need to remind me.

            That said, I suspect 90% of these replies are knee-jerk reactions to my Disqus profile name (AverageBro) and my accompanying avatar (the handsome cartoon version of the real-life handsomer me). This of course makes me wonder if people would respond without resorting to name-calling if they didn't have a basis on which to form said name-calling.

            In short, if people didn't know I was black, would they automatically resort to name-calling? Would I just judged by the content of my comment, rather than the color of my jpeg?

            So to that effect, I'm going to momentarily genericize my Disqus profile just to perform my own social experiment. Maybe I'll do a followup post in awhile. Until then, don't be thrown off. My new screen name is "A/B" and my new avi is that little guy holding the American flag. And if ya' don't know, now ya' know...

            I'd be interested in knowing your Avi Adventures as well.

            Question: Do you find people respond a certain way based on your screen name/avi? Do they make certain assumptions based on this? How/why did you choose your avi/name?

            Wednesday, April 3, 2013

            (Finally!!!) Gets A Long Overdue Facelift.

            Your eyes do not deceive you. That's right folks an actual new post that's not an Open Mic AB.com's got a slightly new, much lighter and brighter look. #AllWhiteErrythang

            Nothing against the old design, but it was just time. You gotta keep it fresh and whatnot. The old banner image and color scheme felt a little dark/dated and since the site just (very quietly) celebrated its 6th anniversary on Monday, I figured now was as good a time as ever. That, and I'm on the road with no kids or wife some actual free time for a change. So enjoy the change of scenery and let me know what ya'll think. The new banner image is a work in progress. My main man @TheotisJones is tossing some ideas around. We'll settle on something eventually. The color scheme overall is a lot cleaner, I think, and I've done with a crisper font. It is, if I must say so, not too bad looking.

            Anyways, I know none of this sh*t actually matters if there aren't new posts, and I'm working on that. You'll see some of our more popular features "recycled" in the coming weeks. If you're a longtime AB.com reader, your eyes aren't deceiving you. That's the same ole' sh*t you read a couple of years ago. Whatever. Roll with it.

            Either way, things should be finally back to normal around here soon. Stay tuned.

            Question: What do you think of our new look? Does it even matter if there's no new content?

            Thursday, March 21, 2013

            So... Yeah, About Our New Commenting System...

            While I was away last week, apparently Disqus, the widely used commenting system, pulled the plug on "old Disqus, and is now forcing all sites to use the new and improved Disqus 2.0. While this new commenting system is vastly superior the prior release (up/down voting, easier moderation, live updates) it's not quite compatible with the custom CSS/XML template I currently use for this site.

            So as a result, a lot of you are prolly getting some cyptic messages about not having a Disqus compatible browser when you try to checkout the comments. I'm guessing this is what's behind the dramatic falloff in new comments this week. Either that, or ya'll just don't like me anymore. I'm hoping it's the former, not the latter.

            In any event, if you're using ie, just toggle the compatibility mode icon (that "broken piece of paper" looking thing in the address bar) and the comments should show up. You won't need an upgraded browser for this. The site looks a little screwy/badly justified when you do this, but fear not. This site is in the midst of a gradual re-branding/facelift anyway. I'll have all this stuff, as well as a brand new banner image (trust me, you'll love it like white women love Jim Halpert) fixed and ironed out in the coming weeks.

            Ok, back to commenting...

            Thursday, October 25, 2012

            AB.com Open Mic.

            I'm busy, so go on without me. Drop links, write your own posts. You know the drill by now.

            Question: What's on your mind today?

            Tuesday, October 23, 2012

            A Handful Of Random Things That Really Annoy Me.

            fairly frequently. I don't comment, but it's a site that I check out on Pulse regularly. Champ and Panama just have a great knack for making mundane stuff entertaining, especially when they do "lists".

            So yeah, it's Tuesday. Consider this imitation/flattery. Or whatever.

            A Handful Of Random Things That Really Annoy Me.
            Cam Newton - I can't figure this cat out. Last year, he seemed to disspel every negative stereotype people had already ascribed to him. They year, he seems hellbent on confirming them all. From the sideline moping, to the ass-holish postgame press conferences, dude is everything you ever hated about pro athletes, with a terrible shape up thrown in for good measure. It's easy to look great when expectations are low. When they're high, and you fall short of them, your true character shows. And Cam, you're not lookin' good homie. Take responsibility for your own actions. Quit blaming everyone when your lame ass is the one throwing 4th quarter picks. Boss the f*ck up!!!

            Chief Keef - Google it if you don't know who this guy is. Then you won't like him either. In any event, the advent of presumably marketable not-of-age trap rappers inevitably begins the slippery slope towards pure, unadulterated coonery. Witness Lil' Poopy. No, this isn't a joke, BTW. He has a mixtape. It's worse than Afghanistan.



            Damnit, man.

            That Really Buff Chick At Gold's Gym Who Looks At Me Sideways While I'm Lifting - Yeah, I get it: you're really strong, and you're a girl. And yeah, push come the shove, you could prolly outlift me. Correction: you could definitely outlift me. Great. But if you give me that "I wish he'd hurry up and finish so I can put some real weights on that bar" look one more time... we gon' have some problems, Zena Warrior Princess.

            Cable News Pundits - I'm not sure why this didn't occur to me sooner, but switching between the 3 major cable news networks the other night after the Obama/Romney debate, it hit me: This isn't "news". At all. This is just entertainment. The goal of cable news isn't to inform: it's merely to affirm what people already are feeling. It's why Fox News and MSNBC can give two wholly different spins on the very same issue. It's why CNN is so lousy and wishy washy. At the core, this sh*t is just entertainment, and it's not even particularly good entertainment.

            The Washington Redskins Secondary - I'll be real here: I'm not a football fan. You already knew this of course, but let me repeat it just in case you missed the memo: I don't like football. I realize how this makes me seem like a less than Real Amurrican, but eff' it. I like what I like, and what I like is basketball. RGIII is making September-October more than "a placeholder till the NBA season begins" for me though. I'm on the bandwagon. Not the "buy a jersey" bandwagon, just the "tune in, watch the whole game, and be slightly dissapointed at the inevitable loss" bandwagon. I just can't get in full blown "buy a jersey" mode until the Redskins and their worse-than-ass-cancer secondary gets blown up tho'. Sorry. As long as a big mouth/little talent guy like D'Angelo Hall is gainfully employed, I'm not giving Daniel Snyder a dollar.

            Children's Birthday Parties - As I've said on the podcast (hey, whatever happened to that?) a million times, I spend most every weekend at some random kid and one of my sons' schools parties? Was that last sentence grammatically correct? Ionno. But I do know that when you invite my kid to your party, and we show up, your a$$ is legally obligated to return the favor. These are the rules. If you break them, you pretty much have just issued me and my free weekends a major "f*ck you". To which I retort, "no, f*ck you". Just see what happens next year when you invite us.

            Paul Ryan - The gig is up on this guy. Once everyone finally realized this alleged "policy wonk" didn't even know the specifics of his own "policy", there wasn't much left to talk about other than P90X. And let's face it, you're a total douche if you actually bought and finished P90X, mostly because people who buy P90X do so because they like to brag to other people about doing P90X. Too bad P90X isn't an actual VP qualification, cause Ryan would have Biden beat. On issues? Not so much.

            The New Blogger Interface - One month in, and I still can't figure out how to spellcheck. This is some bullsh*t, and it's roughly 50% responsible for the dropoff in new posts here on AB.com. The other 50%? Well, that would be my baby daughter. So yeah, blame Blogger.

            The LiveStong "My Plate" App - Excellent concept. And I've lost weight as a result of tracking my calories (15 pounds since August!!!). But Jesus, the only thing more unorganized than this interface is Lance Armstrong's coverups. Fix this, and fix it now, people! Sheesh!
            Question: What's really getting on your nerves right about now? Vent!!!

            Saturday, September 1, 2012

            The AB.com Holiday Open Mic.

            Something will surely pop off over the weekend/Monday. Here's your place to shoot the breeze.

            Question: What's on your mind today?

            Thursday, August 9, 2012

            The Yellow Light Of Death.

            As a guy with a house full of chill'ren and a Day Job, one of the last things I actually get to enjoy for myself is PlayStation. I only play one game (NBA2K12) and only 2-3 times a week tops, but I consider this DaddyTime. It's sacred. And it only happens once the entire family is asleep. With babygirl's nighttime routine constantly evolving, I am finding less and less time to toy around with the awesome post-draft, post-free agency downloadable rosters.

            Last night, I finally got the baby down around 12:30 (my wife was already out of it) and relieved, go to turn on the PS3 for a quick game before I conked out myself[1].

            I press the power button, and this happens...



            Damn, Damn, Daammmmmmnnnnnnnnn (James)!!!!!!

            BTW, no, that isn't me in the video above, if you couldn't tell already. But yeah, my PS3 is toast. Until I sell some more sidebar ads, I'mma have to take up another nighttime hobby. Like reading a book. Or folding baby clothes. Or just sleeping. Arrghhh.

            There's no real reason for this post other than the grovel in my painful loss, and because my man GregT2U2 said so. But mostly the latter.

            Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going somewhere to go cry in my cereal.

            Question: Have you ever had your favorite gadget die at an inopportune time? Tell me bout' it?

            [1] Get it how you live.

            Monday, June 4, 2012

            AB.com Open Mic Monday

            I'm busy today, so either entertain yourselves or weigh in on Friday's epic post. Drop links, write your own posts. You know the drill by now.

            Question: What's on your mind today?

            Tuesday, May 29, 2012

            A Few Notes From The Management Of AB.com.

            Howdy,

            I'm in week two of a very nice four week paternity leave/vacation break, and enjoying every moment of my time at 北京体彩网官方网站 with AverageBabyGirl™. Having a daughter does indeed change your perspective of life in a million and one ways that you can't even imagine. I'm sure I'll elaborate on this at some point, but today is not such a time.

            There wasn't much new material here last week, but that'll be changing shortly, now that the baby has settled into a much more predictable sleep routine (as has my wife). I'd like to thank Antonio for his insightful piece on Obama's Same Sex Marriage pivot, and apologize for not running it sooner. Blogger's got a "new" interface, which proves that "new" isn't always "better". I thought I'd scheduled the piece to run Monday, only to find out long after the fact that it hadn't. So again, thanks to Antonio.

            I'm going to try out a new "experiment" in the coming days. We just passed the magical 3,000 post mark last week, and I'm going to seize the occasion to switch things up. In the next few days, you'll see far more frequent, but far less wordy posts. The goal here is to keep things rolling, lessening the burden of me cranking out wordy posts, while keeping current stories alive for you guys to weigh in on. We'll see how this works.

            Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some DVR'd episodes of The Office to catch up on.

            Two Fingers,

            Jay

            Monday, May 21, 2012

            Open Mic Monday.

            I'm happy to announce the newest addition to AverageFam™. AverageBabyGirl arrived last Thursday morning, clocking in at 7 pounds, 3 ounces of joy. We're all back 北京体彩网官方网站 now and searching for some semblance of normalcy. I suspect it will take a minute.

            In the interim, I've got a great guest post from Antonio coming your way tomorrow, and prolly a few posts from me later in the week. I'm sure ya'll understand the reasons for the slow updates. Babies don't really care about blog posts. At least not yet.

            So yeah, entertain yourselves some more. I'm gonna try and grab a nap.

            Question: What's on your mind today?

            Thursday, May 17, 2012

            Paternity Leave Open Mic.

            By the time you read this, I will be the father of three, as our baby girl is due to make her grand entrance into the world any moment now. So yeah, it's gonna be a minute. Entertain yourselves.

            Question: What's on your mind today?